Something bigger than myself

So I'm back at work. Portfolio is still up from January, I'm currently down 16K from last month. Stocks and commodities are being hammered and I'm quite leveraged with options, so I'm taking a small beating. Mr Williams said from now till summer Gold and Silver will go nowhere, from the beginning of September till December they will rally 20 to 25 percent. I'm going to hold my silver options and probably keep adding.

On to things larger than myself. I feel like I'm looking through a goldfish bowl some times, many times. The person I love has gone back to Australia. I'm all alone. I feel so angry and helpless but I have to keep trying to be strong because I have nobody to fall back on. Nobody really understands. Don't even know if anyone even cares. :(

All the idiots and liars always get the good deals because they know how to manipulate people. I'm sorry that I can't manipulate people. I just want to help people, want people to know the truth, for them to look after themselves, but maybe the way I talk about things is a bit harsh and I don't know any other way. People are just so stupid! How is this possible? The world's being taken over by bastard bankers and fucking governments! People should be revolting on the streets! Not even in the countries that are affected right now but every country should be revolting! But people because think they work harder they'll have a better life, in some aspects that is true but when you're using paper currency backed by the same liars controlling the world and constantly devaluing your earnings, what's the point? Most of the western world have everything. Having material things does not mean having a better life, unfortunately that is what is being purported. You chase money, debt, and you become a slave to the system, to the elite.

Even though I love trading, I know what's real and having numbers in my account means jack shit to me. My shoes have holes but I still wear them because they still work.

If I had one wish it would be to not desire for anything material because all that shit just ends up owning me.

I just wish for the one I love. That is all I really care about.